Loneliness is impacting our communities, strongly associated with poor quality of life and physical and mental health outcomes.
The Australian Institute of Health and Welfare reports that 1 in 4 Australians over sixty report being lonely.
At its worst, chronic loneliness is linked to depression, anxiety, heart disease and weakened immunity.
Retirement and downsizing are both potential contributors to loneliness. Whilst these changes might result in positive outcomes for some, for many it diminishes emotional wellbeing.
Downsizing the family home can have multiple negative effects. Losing emotional attachment to a place where special memories were made and special events took place can be incredibly difficult.
Even for those who have a choice in moving, and many don’t, the loss is tangible. Will our new residence feel like home?
Often downsizing includes the loss of areas important for emotional wellbeing like a garden, outdoor BBQ/kitchen, workshop, or craft space. Is there room for these special places?
Even neighbours might be missed.
The familiarity, informal personal contact, or security of knowing who lives nearby can be part of the benefits of home.
Not immediately obvious is the loss of autonomy or control of your living space.
Needing permission from a body corporate to make changes to the place you call home can be confronting and annoying.
Retirement can be liberating, but the loss of a daily routine and sense of purpose leaves a void that’s hard to fill.
Work colleagues may not have been friends, but they still created daily human interactions. Replacing these interactions is vital in avoiding loneliness.
The key to avoiding loneliness is planning. Your new home should include things important to you.
Is there room for a garden or outdoors area, or is green space easily accessible nearby?
How will you replace or maintain personal interactions? This can be challenging when you move to a new house, suburb, or city.
Schedule regular catch ups with those you value spending time with as a priority.
Even online catch ups help fill a void. During Covid many of us started Zoom catch ups; they’re not the same, but they do provide contact.
A wonderful way to find purpose, create structure and develop connections is to become involved in a charity group.
As a proud member of Rotary New Farm, I value the opportunity to give back to community but equally enjoy the camaraderie of likeminded people. Many such clubs and groups would love new members.
Men’s or women’s sheds, craft clubs, reading groups and community gardens — seek out your passion in your new community and make new friends who share it.
Stay active through activity groups or sporting clubs whilst meeting new friends — walking groups, croquet, golf, bowls or pickleball.
Loneliness is a danger as we transition to a new stage of life. Proactive planning can make an enormous difference but if you are feeling the impact of loneliness, reach out. There is always help available.
Gary Bruce is a counsellor and coach, MHFA Instructor and registered teacher with over 35 years’ experience. His businesses “GoingBeyondResults” and “GaryBruceCounselling,” work online and in person to support adolescents from age 15 to 24 and men aged 40 to 65 achieve positive outcomes. Gary also delivers training in Mental Health First Aid to teachers, parents’ coaches, and employers of youth.
